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What a Time to Fall in Love
written by Lutfi, edited by Kukuh (at a lovely cafe) I imagine our knees eventually protesting against activities as ambitious as climbing stairs, and the two of us spending an unreasonable amount of time arguing about what to watch. You will probably find new ways to annoy me. I will continue treating my own shortcomings…
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On Unnecessary Additions
Dear acquaintance, Your backhanded congratulation is the last thing I want. Not because I need you to be sincere. To be honest, I don’t need it at all. No one owes me congratulations, just as I don’t owe anyone congratulations either. Am I annoyed? Hell nah. I have experienced many worse things, and I could…
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What’s great about a birthday?
What’s great about a birthday is that it’s the one day a year when time becomes polite enough to stop and let us look at it without pretending we can control it. A birthday is a small, honest checkpoint. Not as a scoreboard, but as a gentle reminder that a person has been alive in…
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On Being A Woman
You’ve come to weddings.God knows how many.You’ve seen radiant brides.Wrapped in lace and makeup.Wearing a crown that seems to defy gravity and common sense. You nudge your friends around you.“She’s beautiful,” you whisper.“She is,” they reply.“That thing on her head is heavy, though.” You all chuckle.And sounding wise, they add,“If you can’t handle that weight,…
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Why Didn’t You Tell Me Goodbye Could Feel Like This?
I don’t know how to explain this feeling. It’s not just sadness.And it’s not just joy.It’s a strange mix feeling thatmakes me feel like standingin the middle of a warm goodbye and a cold room. Three of you are moving to a new place, closer to your families.That sentence alone should have made me smile.And…
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The Great Middle Compromise
They try to convince you that being in the middle means balancewhen really,it means being stepped on from both sides. Let’s talk about it.Middle child.Middle class.Middle seat. Middle of your twenties.Where you’re expected to shut up and understand everything.From the temper tantrums of toddlersto the philosophical detours of boomers (who think your stress is invalidbecause…
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Authenticity™, Brought to You by Us
Truman discovered the lie. We build it ourselves. Inspired by The Truman Show, which I only got around to watching last week. You used to take photos to remember things. Now you’re doing things just to take the photos. That unconscious shift is everywhere. The most genuine moments of our lives have become branded, tagged,…
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Kafkaesque at Its Finest
I am not Lutfi.I am 16 numbers my nation assigned to me, just like my bank did.A code to identify me, to track me, to prove that I am real.But not real enough to matter when something breaks. You try to do things the way things are meant to be done.You follow instructions, fill out…
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An Excuse You Called A Virtue
What’s the difference between a boundary and a disguise?Sometimes, just the way you phrase it. Yours came with a slogan: Quality over quantity.Elegant, refined, most of all: comforting. Every time you saw someone post their fifth achievement of the week, their color-coded goals, their neatly crossed-off to-do list by lunchtime, you smiled, sipped your coffee,…
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Why I Fall in Love with Languages
There’s something quietly magical about learning a new language.Not the excitement of discovering new words—but the elation of receiving an invitation to live inside a different truth. Languages aren’t just tools.They are perspectives, they are portals. In Indonesian, money is something you seek—mencari uang—as if it is hidden and you must search for it.In English,…
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10 Romantic Pick-Up Lines to Try on Valentine’s Day
Good luck!
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Schadenfreude: Mengapa Kita Senang Melihat Orang Lain Susah
“Melihat orang lain menderita itu baik bagi seseorang, membuat orang lain menderita itu lebih baik lagi.” Kutipan Nietzsche yang turut membumbui buku ini dapat kita gunakan untuk membagi manusia ke dalam dua kelompok besar. Kelompok pertama adalah mereka yang memprotesnya dan menganggap kalimat tersebut kejam, sedangkan yang kedua adalah mereka yang memprotesnya namun diam-diam berterima…
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A Failure to Process A Failure
What is the color of failure, you ponder.A thought that drifts like a fleeting wander.You’ve long let go of rigid expectations,so failure feels like distant, unclaimed sensations. Your first random guess goes to black,for failure feels like a shadow’s track.But then you recall, you don’t despise,that color’s warmth holds your lover’s eyes. Perhaps it’s neon…
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Pasrah
Saya bisa apa jika ternyata tidak ada yang lebih sederhana daripada memperumit perkara, sedangkan di saat yang sama menyederhanakan perkara juga tidak kalah memecah kepala? Saya bisa apa jika segala yang tidak sempurna ternyata akan senantiasa diterima oleh mereka yang merelakan hatinya terbuka, sedangkan alasan akan selalu muncul di benak mereka yang berniat mencari cela?…
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Hi, Kid(s)
Sejauh ini saya belum memutuskan apa-apa. Tapi sekiranya hati saya terbuka untuk menjadi seorang ibu dan Tuhan sejalan pula, ini sedikit catatan yang merangkum segala yang berlalu-lalang dalam kepala saya. Rupanya saya begitu beruntung dilahirkan dari rahim seorang perempuan yang mengajarkan saya tentang hak-hak yang selayaknya kaum perempuan terima. Hak-hak yang selama ini saya anggap…
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Kisah Suplir
Pastilah aku ini suplir. Yaaaa, sambil memejamkan mata aku mencoba mengingati tempatku dulu mati. Sudut rumah? Hm… bisa jadi. Sama sekali tak ada gambaran yang jelas selayaknya kelahiran kembali pada umumnya. Aku hanya bisa menerka-nerka dan berharap apa yang kususun dalam kepalaku sekarang adalah apa yang memang terjadi pada kenyataannya. Dan… kepala(?) Wah, seperti ini…
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On Us – Part 3
Beberapa pertanyaan yang muncul di benak dua orang yang baru mengenal cinta. Apakah cinta harus dijabarkan ke dalam seribu kata yang mungkin tak dipahami oleh yang jadi tujuan, atau justru harus disingkat dalam beberapa kalimat asal maknanya tersampaikan dengan risiko dicap kurang perjuangan? Apakah yang disebut cinta itu ketika kita menikmati menariknya percakapan atau malah…
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Note 23
Some conversations showed me that people sometimes wondered what they were thinking when they made decisions in the past. Honestly, I hardly ever experienced it. But I still need to prepare, right? Just in case this universe tries to surprise me by throwing unnecessary thought. So, dear my future self, if you read this, these…
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Dua Ketakutan, Selalu
Di satu sisi takut terlalu menghakimi diriDi sisi lain tak ingin jadi bajingan yang selalu minta dimaklumi Di satu sisi tau harus belajar bertoleransiDi sisi lain takut jadi korban manipulasi Di satu sisi ingin mensyukuri segala kondisiDi sisi lain takut tertinggal dengan kemajuan kanan kiri Di satu sisi mau berhenti berbasa-basiDi sisi lain enggan dimusuhi…
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On Us – Part 2
I will always want to write a protracted passage about you, but that doesn’t mean I could not simplify it. You are important because you help me remove the tag from the sentence that has been spinning in my head all this time. “I deserve love, don’t I?” I don’t care if others cannot relate…
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Berastagi: A Trip to Define a Friendship
Disclaimer: Everything that I wrote here will never be able to make this trip more noteworthy than the joke that Farhan (one who drove us) threw. “Jodohmu di mana, Han?”“Kurang tau. Mungkin jodohku masih bersama suaminya.” *** I hate traveling. Period. I always wish that I could be in a new place without taking the…
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On Us – Part 1
Tulus sings almost every moment of our lives. The soundtrack for this letter is: “Coba sehari saja, kau jadi diriku Kau akan mengerti bagaimana kumelihatmu Mengagumimu, menyayangimu” I always want to see you as one thing. Someone who adds up every good thing that I’ve already possessed. For I always believe I am already complete.…
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Can You Guys Just Stop Coughing?
I love biology. That’s why I know it is pretty normal to find an individual flirting with others in his/her species. I also love seeing the way this creature flirts. Except one: my own species. I see in most organisms that exist, the male takes charge to seduce his partner candidate. Once again I say:…
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The Why
Blog ini sampai pada keberadaannya seperti sekarang karena beberapa alasan. Pertama, aku sadar manusia mengalami perubahan yang seringkali sulit disadari. Kalo kata Tulus dalam Ruang Sendiri, “Kita berevolusi”, sedangkan kalau kata Richard Dawkins dalam The Magic of Reality “… setiap hari sepanjang hidup Anda, sewaktu terbangun Anda adalah orang yang sama dengan yang pergi tidur…